Staying connected is important, especially to help you get through that definitive first year of marriage (aka The Paper Year). We’ve consulted Lissy Puno, a Singapore-based counselling psychologist and marriage guru to give us some tips on how to preserve or rekindle that connection with one’s spouse.
Recent close encounters with (not the third kind but with) newly married couples reminded us of two things. One: adjusting to married life is often difficult and poses a very real threat to your sanity (can we get an “Amen”?). And two: it’s been months since we promised a follow-up to this article on the challenges newlyweds face. For both, we are truly sorry. But don’t stay mad at us for too long! We’ll try to make it up to you by sharing these tips for staying connected with your spouse as relayed to us by Singapore-based counselling psychologist Lissy Puno.
Organizing a wedding is a cinch compared to the many challenges facing just married couples. To help you get through that definitive first year of marriage, we’ve consulted Lissy Puno, a Singapore-based counselling psychologist who is also a marriage guru in her own right.
Most just married or soon-to-wed couples are level-headed enough to know that married life is nothing at all like Cloud Nine (operative word: most). But the reality is, you’re never truly prepared for that first fight, first scream fest, or first walk out. So while we might not be there to literally hold your hand through the difficult first year of marriage (we have our own lives you know), we’ve taken it upon ourselves to do as much as we can to help.
Just Married: When the Honeymoon Ends
Marriage is a walk in the park. That is if the park were the Grand Canyon, and you’re forced to carry a 60L backpack while walking barefoot through the whole thing. In short, it’s friggin’ hard!!! And the first year is the hardest. Fights can start even before the honeymoon ends—and over the smallest things too!
“We had our first fight over salted egg. My husband was used to it being sliced, but where I came from, we peeled ours.” – Babes
“I was leaving for a work trip. My wife had taken a dump but the flush wasn’t working. Because I was feeling so much pressure at work, I ended up shouting at her over it. There was a lot of crying. I ended up missing my flight and rebooking for the next day. We laugh so much about it whenever we remember that fight.” – AE